We all have what Buddhism refers to as the "monkey mind."  Like a monkey jumping from tree to tree, our minds jump from thought to thought.

Most of the thoughts that we think each day are a repetition of our thoughts from the day before, with some slight variations.

More importantly, our thoughts shape our emotions, which shape our actions, which determine our outcomes.

Therefore, if we want to change our lives, we can start by changing our thoughts.

Easier said than done, right?

Maybe not.

Let's start with an example that I see all the time.  It's the internal dialogue that many stalled job seekers share.


Imagine, for a moment, that you really want a specific job.  The problem is, every time you think about the job, your monkey mind says, "Why would they hire me? There are plenty of people more qualified for that position."

The first step is to separate the monkey mind from the self.  Coaching calls this type of internal dialogue your "gremlin." A gremlin says you're not good enough, or that you can't do something.  By labeling and even naming the monkey mind or the gremlin, you can get some distance from it.

Now, let's look at the connection between thought, emotion, action and outcome.

When I think "Why would they hire me?" (Thought), it's likely I'll feel pretty down about myself and my prospects for getting the job (Emotion).  Feeling as low as I do, I probably won't apply for the job (Action, or rather lack of Action).  Having not applied for the job, I'm guaranteed not to get the job (Outcome).

Now let's try changing the thought and see what happens.

Instead of "Why would they hire me?" I'll choose to think "I am an accomplished and passionate professional." (Thought).  When I hear these words, I feel upbeat and confident (Emotion).  Feeling upbeat, I decide to review my resume to make sure that my accomplishments are shining through (Action).  I then create a cover letter that conveys my passion for this job, which we know I really want (Action).  I then submit my formal application for the job (Action).  Now that I've applied and confidently shown off what I have to offer, there's a good chance I'll be called in for an interview (Outcome).

The postscript is that it's important to choose a thought that you believe, and this isn't always a straightforward process.  But with a little practice and the proper support, you'll be well on your way to creating your life anew.